George Carlin was an American comedian of the 70's and
80's. He was
known to be a little foul-mouthed and it is
fascinating that after the
death of his wife and 9-11 he would write the
following.
A wonderful Message by George Carlin:
The paradox of our time in history is that we have
taller buildings but
shorter tempers, wider freeways, but narrower
viewpoints.
We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy
less. We have
bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences,
but less time.
We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge,
but less
judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more
medicine, but less
wellness.
We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too
recklessly, laugh too little,
drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get
up too tired, read too
little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.
We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our
values. We talk
too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.
We've learned how to make a living, but not a life.
We've added years to life
not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon
and back, but have trouble
crossing the street to meet a new neighbour.
We conquered outer space but not inner space. We've
done larger
things, but not better things.
We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul.
We've conquered the atom,
but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less.
We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to
rush, but not to
wait. We build more computers to hold more
information, to produce
more copies than ever, but we communicate less and
less.
These are the times of fast foods and slow
digestion, big men and small
character, steep profits and shallow relationships.
These are the days of two
incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken
homes.
These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers,
throwaway
morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and
pills that do
everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time
when there is
much in the showroom window and nothing in the
stockroom.
A time when technology can bring this letter to
you, and a time when you can
choose either to share this insight, or to just hit
delete.
ALWAYS REMEMBER:
Life, is not measured by the number of breaths we
take, but by the moments
that take our breath away.
Sunday, October 31, 2004
Life
Tuesday, October 12, 2004
TRUST is a very important factor for all relationships
When trust is broken, it is the end of the relationship. Lack of trust leads to suspicion, suspicion generates anger, anger causes enmity and enmity may result in separation.
A telephone operator told me that one day she received a phone call. She answered, "Public Utilities Board." There was silence. She repeated, "PUB."
There was still no answer. When she was going to cut off the line, she Heard a lady's voice, "Oh, so this is PUB. Sorry, I got the number from my Husband's pocket but I do not know whose number it is." Without mutual trust, just imagine what will happen to the couple if the telephone operator answered with just "hello" instead of "PUB".
-----------------------------------------------------------------
NO POINTING FINGERS
A man asked his father-in-law, "Many people praised you for a successful marriage. Could you please share with me your secret?" The father-in-law answered in a smile, "Never criticise your wife for her shortcomings or when she does something wrong. Always bear in mind that because of her shortcomings and weaknesses, she could not find a better husband than you."
We all look forward to being loved and respected. Many people are afraid of losing face. Generally, when a person makes a mistake, he would look around to find a scapegoat to point the finger at.
This is the start of a war. We should always remember that when we point one finger at a person, the other four fingers are pointing at ourselves.
If we forgive others, others will ignore our mistake too.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
CREATING PERFECT RELATIONSHIPS?
A person visited the government matchmaker for marriage, SDU, and requested "I am looking for a spouse. Please help me to find a suitable one."
The SDU officer said, "Your requirements, please." "Oh, good looking, polite, humorous, sporty, knowledgeable, good in singing and dancing. Willing to accompany me the whole day at home during my leisure hour, if I don't go out. Telling me interesting stories when I need companion for conversation and be silent when I want to rest."
The officer listened carefully and replied, "I understand you need television."
There is a saying that a perfect match can only be found between a blind wife and a deaf husband, because the blind wife cannot see the faults of the husband and the deaf husband cannot hear the nagging of the wife.
Many couples are blind and deaf at the courting stage and dream of perpetual perfect relationship. Unfortunately, when the excitement of love wears off, they wake up and discover that marriage is not a bed of roses.
The nightmare begins.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
NO OVERPOWERING
Many relationships fail because one party tries to overpower another, or demands too much. People in love tend to think that love will conquer all and their spouses will change the bad habits after marriage.
Actually, this is not the case. There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "It is easier to reshape a mountain or a river than a person's character."
It is not easy to change. Thus, having high expectation on changing the spouse character will cause disappointment and unpleasantness.
It would be less painful to change ourselves and lower our expectations..
----------------------------------------------------------------------
RIGHT SPEECH
There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "A speech will either prosper or ruin a nation." Many relationships break off because of wrong speech. When a couple is too close with each other, we always forget mutual respect and courtesy. We may say anything without considering if it would hurt the other party.
A friend and her millionaire husband visited their construction site. A worker who wore a helmet saw her and shouted, "Hi, Emily! Remember me? We used to date in the secondary school." On the way home, her millionaire husband teased her, "Luckily you married me. Otherwise you will be the wife of a construction worker." She answered, "You should appreciate that you married me. Otherwise, he will be the millionaire and not you."
Frequently exchanging these remarks plants the seed for a bad relationship.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
PERSONAL PERCEPTION
Different people have different perception. One man's meat could be another man's poison. A couple bought a donkey from the market. On the way home, a boy commented, "Very stupid. Why neither of them ride on the donkey?"
Upon hearing that, the husband let the wife ride on the donkey.
He walked besides them. Later, an old man saw it and commented, "The husband is the head of family.
How can the wife ride on the donkey while the husband is on foot?" Hearing this, the wife quickly got down and let the husband ride on the donkey.
Further on the way home, they met an old Lady. She commented, "How can the man ride on the donkey but let the wife walk. He is no gentleman."
The husband thus quickly asked the wife to join him on the donkey.
Then, they met a young man. He commented, "Poor donkey, how can you hold up the weight of two persons. They are cruel to you."
Hearing that, the husband and wife immediately climbed down from the donkey and carried it on their shoulders. It seems to be the only choice left.
Later, on a narrow bridge, the donkey was frightened and struggled. They lost their balance and fell into the river.
You can never have everyone praise you, nor will everyone condemn you.
Never in the past, not at present, and never will be in the future.
Thus, do not be too bothered by others words if our conscience is clear..
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
BE PATIENT
This is a true story which happened in the States.
A man came out of his home to admire his new truck. To his puzzlement, his three-year-old son was happily hammering dents into the shiny paint of the truck.
The man ran to his son, knocked him away, hammered the little boy's hands into pulp as punishment.
When the father calmed down, he rushed his son to the hospital. Although the doctor tried desperately to save the crushed bones, he finally had to amputate the fingers from both the boy's hands.
When the boy woke up from the surgery & saw his bandaged stubs, he innocently said, " Daddy, I'm sorry about your truck." Then he asked, "but when are my fingers going to grow back?"
The father went home & committed suicide. Think about this story the next time someone steps on your feet or u wish to take revenge. Think first before u lose your patience with someone u love. Trucks can be repaired.. Broken bones & hurt feelings often can't.
Too often we fail to recognise the difference between the person and the performance. We forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge.
People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Pause and ponder. Think before you act. Be patient.
Forgive & forget.
Love one and all.
If you judge people, you have no time to love them.
A telephone operator told me that one day she received a phone call. She answered, "Public Utilities Board." There was silence. She repeated, "PUB."
There was still no answer. When she was going to cut off the line, she Heard a lady's voice, "Oh, so this is PUB. Sorry, I got the number from my Husband's pocket but I do not know whose number it is." Without mutual trust, just imagine what will happen to the couple if the telephone operator answered with just "hello" instead of "PUB".
-----------------------------------------------------------------
NO POINTING FINGERS
A man asked his father-in-law, "Many people praised you for a successful marriage. Could you please share with me your secret?" The father-in-law answered in a smile, "Never criticise your wife for her shortcomings or when she does something wrong. Always bear in mind that because of her shortcomings and weaknesses, she could not find a better husband than you."
We all look forward to being loved and respected. Many people are afraid of losing face. Generally, when a person makes a mistake, he would look around to find a scapegoat to point the finger at.
This is the start of a war. We should always remember that when we point one finger at a person, the other four fingers are pointing at ourselves.
If we forgive others, others will ignore our mistake too.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
CREATING PERFECT RELATIONSHIPS?
A person visited the government matchmaker for marriage, SDU, and requested "I am looking for a spouse. Please help me to find a suitable one."
The SDU officer said, "Your requirements, please." "Oh, good looking, polite, humorous, sporty, knowledgeable, good in singing and dancing. Willing to accompany me the whole day at home during my leisure hour, if I don't go out. Telling me interesting stories when I need companion for conversation and be silent when I want to rest."
The officer listened carefully and replied, "I understand you need television."
There is a saying that a perfect match can only be found between a blind wife and a deaf husband, because the blind wife cannot see the faults of the husband and the deaf husband cannot hear the nagging of the wife.
Many couples are blind and deaf at the courting stage and dream of perpetual perfect relationship. Unfortunately, when the excitement of love wears off, they wake up and discover that marriage is not a bed of roses.
The nightmare begins.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
NO OVERPOWERING
Many relationships fail because one party tries to overpower another, or demands too much. People in love tend to think that love will conquer all and their spouses will change the bad habits after marriage.
Actually, this is not the case. There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "It is easier to reshape a mountain or a river than a person's character."
It is not easy to change. Thus, having high expectation on changing the spouse character will cause disappointment and unpleasantness.
It would be less painful to change ourselves and lower our expectations..
----------------------------------------------------------------------
RIGHT SPEECH
There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "A speech will either prosper or ruin a nation." Many relationships break off because of wrong speech. When a couple is too close with each other, we always forget mutual respect and courtesy. We may say anything without considering if it would hurt the other party.
A friend and her millionaire husband visited their construction site. A worker who wore a helmet saw her and shouted, "Hi, Emily! Remember me? We used to date in the secondary school." On the way home, her millionaire husband teased her, "Luckily you married me. Otherwise you will be the wife of a construction worker." She answered, "You should appreciate that you married me. Otherwise, he will be the millionaire and not you."
Frequently exchanging these remarks plants the seed for a bad relationship.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
PERSONAL PERCEPTION
Different people have different perception. One man's meat could be another man's poison. A couple bought a donkey from the market. On the way home, a boy commented, "Very stupid. Why neither of them ride on the donkey?"
Upon hearing that, the husband let the wife ride on the donkey.
He walked besides them. Later, an old man saw it and commented, "The husband is the head of family.
How can the wife ride on the donkey while the husband is on foot?" Hearing this, the wife quickly got down and let the husband ride on the donkey.
Further on the way home, they met an old Lady. She commented, "How can the man ride on the donkey but let the wife walk. He is no gentleman."
The husband thus quickly asked the wife to join him on the donkey.
Then, they met a young man. He commented, "Poor donkey, how can you hold up the weight of two persons. They are cruel to you."
Hearing that, the husband and wife immediately climbed down from the donkey and carried it on their shoulders. It seems to be the only choice left.
Later, on a narrow bridge, the donkey was frightened and struggled. They lost their balance and fell into the river.
You can never have everyone praise you, nor will everyone condemn you.
Never in the past, not at present, and never will be in the future.
Thus, do not be too bothered by others words if our conscience is clear..
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
BE PATIENT
This is a true story which happened in the States.
A man came out of his home to admire his new truck. To his puzzlement, his three-year-old son was happily hammering dents into the shiny paint of the truck.
The man ran to his son, knocked him away, hammered the little boy's hands into pulp as punishment.
When the father calmed down, he rushed his son to the hospital. Although the doctor tried desperately to save the crushed bones, he finally had to amputate the fingers from both the boy's hands.
When the boy woke up from the surgery & saw his bandaged stubs, he innocently said, " Daddy, I'm sorry about your truck." Then he asked, "but when are my fingers going to grow back?"
The father went home & committed suicide. Think about this story the next time someone steps on your feet or u wish to take revenge. Think first before u lose your patience with someone u love. Trucks can be repaired.. Broken bones & hurt feelings often can't.
Too often we fail to recognise the difference between the person and the performance. We forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge.
People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Pause and ponder. Think before you act. Be patient.
Forgive & forget.
Love one and all.
If you judge people, you have no time to love them.
Monday, October 04, 2004
Never Be Disappointed Soon
We see in our lives that what we try to achieve is not always in our
reach.
We try once or sometimes twice to attain our goal, but as soon as we see
that there is difficulty in reaching towards it, we refrain from it very
soon, finding excuses or get disappointed.
We have numerous examples in front of us to see how success can be
attained.
There is nothing easy in this world.Difficulties in our path is sure to
follow and to avoid anything difficult is to go through it.For this we
should not let disappoinment affect us.
Challenges are there for us to keep on trying hard.
In human relationship, we encounter massive emotional disturbances.Its
all
due to our own behaviour of letting things go out of our hands. One gets
dejected of their close one's attitude if misunderstood. What is needed
is
there, is to work out for the best possible relationship. Time and space
should be given and one must try to understand other's feelings and
misgivings. Normally one do get disappointed in convincing other, but
there
is always a chance of eliminating any problem facing emotional crisis. We
must try hard and give all the possible method of normalising our
relationship with others.
Likewise, in life too we must try and try till we succeed as saying goes
"
Nothing succeeds like success." So difficulties should be faced with much
ease and not let disappointment affect us. Life is not a bed of roses so
we
must face the challenges and wait for the result
reach.
We try once or sometimes twice to attain our goal, but as soon as we see
that there is difficulty in reaching towards it, we refrain from it very
soon, finding excuses or get disappointed.
We have numerous examples in front of us to see how success can be
attained.
There is nothing easy in this world.Difficulties in our path is sure to
follow and to avoid anything difficult is to go through it.For this we
should not let disappoinment affect us.
Challenges are there for us to keep on trying hard.
In human relationship, we encounter massive emotional disturbances.Its
all
due to our own behaviour of letting things go out of our hands. One gets
dejected of their close one's attitude if misunderstood. What is needed
is
there, is to work out for the best possible relationship. Time and space
should be given and one must try to understand other's feelings and
misgivings. Normally one do get disappointed in convincing other, but
there
is always a chance of eliminating any problem facing emotional crisis. We
must try hard and give all the possible method of normalising our
relationship with others.
Likewise, in life too we must try and try till we succeed as saying goes
"
Nothing succeeds like success." So difficulties should be faced with much
ease and not let disappointment affect us. Life is not a bed of roses so
we
must face the challenges and wait for the result
Would you cry?
A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, he said...no. She
asked him if he would want to be with her forever....and he said no.
She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, and once again
he replied with a no. She had heard enough.
As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her
arm and said....
You're not pretty you're beautiful.
I dont want to be with you forever. I NEED to be with you forever.
And I wouldnt cry if you walked away...I'd die...
asked him if he would want to be with her forever....and he said no.
She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, and once again
he replied with a no. She had heard enough.
As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her
arm and said....
You're not pretty you're beautiful.
I dont want to be with you forever. I NEED to be with you forever.
And I wouldnt cry if you walked away...I'd die...
Friday, October 01, 2004
Put the glass down
A professor began his class by holding up a glass with some water in it. He
held it up for all to see, and asked the students, "How much do you think
this glass weighs?"
'50gms!' .... '100gms!'...'125gms' ...the students answered.
"I really don't know unless I weigh it", said the professor. "But my
question is: What would happen if I held it up like this for a few
minutes?"
"Nothing", the students said.
"Ok what would happen if I held it up like this for an hour?" the professor
asked.
"Your arm would begin to ache", said one of the students.
"You're right, now what would happen if I held it for a day?"
"Your arm could go numb, you might have severe muscle stress and paralysis
and have to go to hospital for sure!", ventured another student and all the
students laughed.
"Very good. But during all this, did the weight of the glass change?" asked
the professor.
"No".
"Then what caused the arm ache and the muscle stress?"
The students were puzzled.
"Put the glass down!" said one of the students.
"Exactly!" said the professor. "Life's problems are something like this.
Hold it for a few minutes in your head and they seem OK. Think of them for
a long time and they begin to ache. Hold it even longer and they begin to
paralyze you. You will not be able to do anything."
It's important to think of the challenges (problems) in your life, but EVEN
MORE IMPORTANT, is to 'put them down' at the end of every day before you go
to sleep. That way, you are not stressed, you wake up every day fresh and
strong, and can handle any issue, any challenge that comes your way!' So,
as it becomes time for you to leave office today, remember to
'PUT THE GLASS DOWN TODAY! '
held it up for all to see, and asked the students, "How much do you think
this glass weighs?"
'50gms!' .... '100gms!'...'125gms' ...the students answered.
"I really don't know unless I weigh it", said the professor. "But my
question is: What would happen if I held it up like this for a few
minutes?"
"Nothing", the students said.
"Ok what would happen if I held it up like this for an hour?" the professor
asked.
"Your arm would begin to ache", said one of the students.
"You're right, now what would happen if I held it for a day?"
"Your arm could go numb, you might have severe muscle stress and paralysis
and have to go to hospital for sure!", ventured another student and all the
students laughed.
"Very good. But during all this, did the weight of the glass change?" asked
the professor.
"No".
"Then what caused the arm ache and the muscle stress?"
The students were puzzled.
"Put the glass down!" said one of the students.
"Exactly!" said the professor. "Life's problems are something like this.
Hold it for a few minutes in your head and they seem OK. Think of them for
a long time and they begin to ache. Hold it even longer and they begin to
paralyze you. You will not be able to do anything."
It's important to think of the challenges (problems) in your life, but EVEN
MORE IMPORTANT, is to 'put them down' at the end of every day before you go
to sleep. That way, you are not stressed, you wake up every day fresh and
strong, and can handle any issue, any challenge that comes your way!' So,
as it becomes time for you to leave office today, remember to
'PUT THE GLASS DOWN TODAY! '
The Pebble Story (thinking out of the box)
If we think hard, we can also be like this wise girl!
Many hundreds of years ago in a small Italian town, a merchant had the misfortune of owing a large sum of money to a moneylender. The moneylender, who was old and ugly, fancied the merchant's beautiful daughter. So he proposed a bargain. He said he would forgo the merchant's debt if he could marry his daughter. Both the merchant and his daughter were horrified by the proposal. So the cunning money-lender suggested that they let providence decide the matter. He told them that he would put a black pebble and a white pebble into an empty money bag. Then the girl would have to pick one pebble from the bag.
If she picked the black pebble, she would become his wife and her father's debt would be forgiven. If she picked the white pebble she need not marry him and her father's debt would still be forgiven. But if she refused to pick a pebble, her father would be thrown into jail. They were standing on a pebble strewn path in the merchant's garden. As they talked, the moneylender bent over to pick up two pebbles. As he picked them up, the sharp-eyed girl noticed that he had picked up two black pebbles and put them into the bag. He then asked the girl to pick a pebble from the bag. Now, imagine you were standing in the merchant's garden. What would you have done if you were the girl?
If you had to advise her, what would you have told her?
Careful analysis would produce three possibilities:
1 The girl should refuse to take a pebble.
2 The girl should show that there were two black pebbles in the bag and expose the money-lender as a cheat. 3 The girl should pick a black pebble and sacrifice herself in order to save her father from his debt and imprisonment. Take a moment to ponder over the story. The above story is used with the hope that it will make us appreciate the difference between lateral and logical thinking. The girl's dilemma cannot be solved with traditional logical thinking. Think of the consequences if she chooses the above logical answers.
What would you recommend to the Girl to do?
The girl put her hand into the moneybag and drew out a pebble. Without looking at it, she fumbled and let it fall onto the pebble-strewn path where it immediately became lost among all the other pebbles. "Oh, how clumsy of me" she said. "But never mind, if you look into the bag for the one that is left, you will be able to tell which pebble I picked." Since the remaining pebble is black, it must be assumed that she had picked the white one. And since the money-lender dared not admit his dishonesty, the girl changed what seemed an impossible situation into an extremely advantageous one.
MORAL OF THE STORY:
Most complex problems do have a solution it is only that we don't attempt to think.
Many hundreds of years ago in a small Italian town, a merchant had the misfortune of owing a large sum of money to a moneylender. The moneylender, who was old and ugly, fancied the merchant's beautiful daughter. So he proposed a bargain. He said he would forgo the merchant's debt if he could marry his daughter. Both the merchant and his daughter were horrified by the proposal. So the cunning money-lender suggested that they let providence decide the matter. He told them that he would put a black pebble and a white pebble into an empty money bag. Then the girl would have to pick one pebble from the bag.
If she picked the black pebble, she would become his wife and her father's debt would be forgiven. If she picked the white pebble she need not marry him and her father's debt would still be forgiven. But if she refused to pick a pebble, her father would be thrown into jail. They were standing on a pebble strewn path in the merchant's garden. As they talked, the moneylender bent over to pick up two pebbles. As he picked them up, the sharp-eyed girl noticed that he had picked up two black pebbles and put them into the bag. He then asked the girl to pick a pebble from the bag. Now, imagine you were standing in the merchant's garden. What would you have done if you were the girl?
If you had to advise her, what would you have told her?
Careful analysis would produce three possibilities:
1 The girl should refuse to take a pebble.
2 The girl should show that there were two black pebbles in the bag and expose the money-lender as a cheat. 3 The girl should pick a black pebble and sacrifice herself in order to save her father from his debt and imprisonment. Take a moment to ponder over the story. The above story is used with the hope that it will make us appreciate the difference between lateral and logical thinking. The girl's dilemma cannot be solved with traditional logical thinking. Think of the consequences if she chooses the above logical answers.
What would you recommend to the Girl to do?
The girl put her hand into the moneybag and drew out a pebble. Without looking at it, she fumbled and let it fall onto the pebble-strewn path where it immediately became lost among all the other pebbles. "Oh, how clumsy of me" she said. "But never mind, if you look into the bag for the one that is left, you will be able to tell which pebble I picked." Since the remaining pebble is black, it must be assumed that she had picked the white one. And since the money-lender dared not admit his dishonesty, the girl changed what seemed an impossible situation into an extremely advantageous one.
MORAL OF THE STORY:
Most complex problems do have a solution it is only that we don't attempt to think.
POSITIVE QUOTE OF THE DAY
-----------------------------
All high achievers plan their work and work their plan, for they are keenly aware that "luck" is most often being prepared to take advantage of a situation.
-- Unknown
All high achievers plan their work and work their plan, for they are keenly aware that "luck" is most often being prepared to take advantage of a situation.
-- Unknown
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